May11
Bicycling.
Editor’s Notes
For the rest of this summer, we will operate on a once-a-week reduced schedule, with occasional exceptions.
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↓ Transcript
In panel 1 of 9, two men are standing near three bicycles. A sign announces on two lines: Bicycle Store / Premium Bikes.
Man 1: Definitely get a lightweight bicycle.
Man 2: Thanks so much for helping me pick one.
In panel 2, man 1 now stands next to a bicycle above which a sign shows a crossed-out "$7500" and below that "SALE $6900."
Man 1: Sure. That’s what friends are for.
Man 1: This one has a super-light frame made of a space-age material.
Panel 3 shows man 1 sitting on a bicycle in a low-profile position, with back sharply bent and head positioned lower than back and close to the handlebars.
Man 1: This ultra-crouching position lowers your drag coefficient and almost eliminates pedaling effort.
Panel 4 shows what might be a T-shirt or short-sleeve shirt. A price label on it reads: $289.99.
Voice in double quotes: “You’ll need synthetic microfiber bicycle clothes to keep wind resistance down.”
Panel 5 shows a low-profile helmet. A price label on it reads: $649.99.
Voice in doble quotes: “The sintered nano-particle surface of this helmet creates a laminar airflow around your head. You will effortlessly glide like a feather.”
Panel 6 shows man 2 and a bicycle in the background.
Man 2: Omigod! That bicycle and all those fancy accessories will cost me more than I paid for my car!
Panel 7 shows man 1.
Man 1: Dude, it’ll be totally worth it. This is no place to skimp. You’ll feel like an eagle soaring.
Off-panel voice: I can’t wait to get started bicycling!
Panel 8 shows man 2.
Man 2: I hate gyms and I really need to get regular strenuous exercise to get my heart rate way up into the exercise zone.
The final panel 9 shows both man 1 and man 2 standing with arms to sides.
Man 1: Oh.
Man 1: You know what. Let’s try Walmart.
Title: Bicycling.
Man 1: Definitely get a lightweight bicycle.
Man 2: Thanks so much for helping me pick one.
In panel 2, man 1 now stands next to a bicycle above which a sign shows a crossed-out "$7500" and below that "SALE $6900."
Man 1: Sure. That’s what friends are for.
Man 1: This one has a super-light frame made of a space-age material.
Panel 3 shows man 1 sitting on a bicycle in a low-profile position, with back sharply bent and head positioned lower than back and close to the handlebars.
Man 1: This ultra-crouching position lowers your drag coefficient and almost eliminates pedaling effort.
Panel 4 shows what might be a T-shirt or short-sleeve shirt. A price label on it reads: $289.99.
Voice in double quotes: “You’ll need synthetic microfiber bicycle clothes to keep wind resistance down.”
Panel 5 shows a low-profile helmet. A price label on it reads: $649.99.
Voice in doble quotes: “The sintered nano-particle surface of this helmet creates a laminar airflow around your head. You will effortlessly glide like a feather.”
Panel 6 shows man 2 and a bicycle in the background.
Man 2: Omigod! That bicycle and all those fancy accessories will cost me more than I paid for my car!
Panel 7 shows man 1.
Man 1: Dude, it’ll be totally worth it. This is no place to skimp. You’ll feel like an eagle soaring.
Off-panel voice: I can’t wait to get started bicycling!
Panel 8 shows man 2.
Man 2: I hate gyms and I really need to get regular strenuous exercise to get my heart rate way up into the exercise zone.
The final panel 9 shows both man 1 and man 2 standing with arms to sides.
Man 1: Oh.
Man 1: You know what. Let’s try Walmart.
Title: Bicycling.